For Miraculous, Life-Changing Love? You Have To Go All In.

Brooke Meredith
7 min readJun 8, 2020
image by Christian Newman from

You can’t experience soulmate-like, life-changing, awesome love unless you go all in.


And further, what does “going all in” look like?

Consider the following examples.

You play in one of your routine lacrosse games, or, dance in a ballet recital. You decide beforehand that you probably aren’t going to succeed anyway. That you aren’t that good at lacrosse or ballet. And that everything will likely be a flop, regardless. You won’t win the lacrosse match, or, you won’t execute the ballet moves well. And because you believe this ahead of time, you will play lacrosse not so well, or, you will not dance to the best of your ability.

You go to write a book, or an article, or put together a lesson plan for your class of kids, or work on calculations for an engineering project, or plant some flowers. Yet, before you even get started, you think to yourself: I am not going to be able to do this well. It isn’t going to work out. I am going to fail anyway. I don’t feel like I can make this happen.

Guess what happens then?

Your heart isn’t in it.

You go into it, already feeling semi-defeated. You lag. You put less effort and hope into the project or activity since you don’t believe in the results. Your attention is ever somewhat elsewhere (in the realm of “I can’t do this, or, this isn’t going to work out for me anyway”).

And guess what?

You don’t make it happen.

It comes out…lacking. If it even actualizes at all.

Your book or article is less than, stilted, it doesn’t have punch, it’s lacking the heart or emotion that an engaging and fantastic story has. Your calculations are off. Your lesson plan falls flat. Your garden is…lackluster.

And then you assume: I was right. It wasn’t going to work out anyway. I wasn’t good enough. It was doomed to fail.

This is called a self-fulling prophecy. You believe something will turn out a certain way, and so subconsciously, your actions going forward make this reality actualize. Then you think, “see, I know it! It wasn’t going to work out. I was right all along.” When in…