Love and Deceit: Can They Co-Exist?

To answer this question, we need to ask a few more first…

Brooke Meredith

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image by Jametlene Reskp from Unsplash.com

So, can love and dishonesty co-exist?

In some ways, absolutely.

For instance, in the case of holding back not saying certain things…

Let’s say you might be having a moment where you’re finding a loved one particularly annoying and tough to be around. This does not necessarily need to be voiced, because part of loving someone means dealing with them in both their awesome moments as well as their difficult ones, and since we all have bad moments, it can be a pointless thing, and even a cruel one, to always point out whenever your loved one is not an utter delight to be around.

Of course, on the flip side, there might be moments that, yes, it is of importance and benefit to tell someone you love when they’re acting in a not-so-great way. This is a reality too. It depends on the specific situation.

Asking yourself some questions about it will help with figuring that out, such as:

Will telling them this potentially aid them in relevant personal growth?

Will it help them with solving a problem?

Will it help draw attention to a problematic behavior you see in them regularly otherwise? That could then help them with improving themselves and their life.

Is this a significantly upsetting and/or problematic behavior you see in this person often or is it more of a rarer, one-off?

Questions like these can help with figuring out if something is worth mentioning. If it’s worth talking about or drawing their attention to, or instead, simply letting go.

Then there are the white lies we all tell that would serve absolutely no purpose in telling…

They would not benefit the recipient, and they would not benefit the one telling the white lie.

For instance, a close friend of yours gets a haircut. You notice it and don’t think it looks good. There is no kind or beneficial reason to tell them this. All it would do is hurt your friend…

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